Broken
by Super-Agent Kay
Summary: He betrayed Voldemort in an attempt to save Harry, but Harry believes that he only has his own interests at heart. Now Snape is badly injured and emotionally beaten, a broken man. Could Hermione be his saviour?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: All of the characters and some of the settings within this piece of fiction are property of J.K. Rowling.

1. Fresh From the Fight

_After another great battle with Voldemort in this ongoing war of our time, Harry Potter and Remus Lupin were travelling, in the dead of night through the English countryside, far enough away from the battle site and it's magics in order to apparate, only they had very unlikely company. Remus Lupin was carrying Severus Snape, one of Lord Voldemort's most faithful Death Eaters. He had been badly injured and, although he did not make a sound, was evidently in immense pain._

"I should put an end to his sorry fucking life right now" Harry Potter spat angrily, pressing his wand firmly against Severus Snapes's hollow, deathly face. Snape merely looked up at him blankly for a second, then let his head fall again.

Remus Lupin glanced at Harry sympathetically, struggling slightly as he tried to support a very weak and defeated Snape. "Now Harry. Lets not be to hasty until we discover the truth, and for that I think that we can wait until morning."

"The truth? I can do that for you right now. _Professor _Snape here thought that he would switch sides once more when he realised exactly who was going to win! Loyal servant of the Dark Lord? Loyal friend to Dumbledore? The only person that _this_ bastard is loyal to is himself."

"Harry, you may be correct but right now we do not know for certain. The only person able to tell us saved your life tonight, and spent several hours under the Cruciatus Curse because of it. If Severus's only goal was to seek refuge in us, then he paid a high price for it. Come Harry, credit must be given where credit is due. "

"Fine." Muttered Harry, he had a point – not that Harry was going to admit it, after all this man killed Dumbledore and no matter how many lives he saved, Harry would never ever forgive Snape. Lupin's habit of seeing the good in everyone reminded him of Dumbledore, and he only hoped that any trust that Lupin had in Snape would not cause him a similar fate.

"Now Severus, please remind me of your home address once more as I doubt that you are in any fit state to apparate us, or even yourself there." Remus asked with kindness in his voice.

It was apparent that Snape was having trouble speaking. He wheezed and coughed, a trickle of blood escaping from the corner of his mouth.

"Spinner's End" he finally managed to whisper.

"Ready Harry?"

"Yes."

And with that, all three of them vanished from the night. Harry was still a little uncomfortable with the whole apparating business, as they sped through a tunnel of air he began to feel slightly ill. After what seemed a little too long, they eventually arrived at their destination. Harry was surprised at where he found himself and almost asked if they had made a mistake until he saw Lupin heading off, with Snape clutching onto him. They had arrived in a dank, run down housing estate, hardly the kind of place that Harry had expected Snape to reside. Harry followed and after a short walk, they found themselves standing at the front door of a small, dark house with dirty windows and an overgrown garden. Lupin tapped the lock with his wand and it fell open. The smell of mustiness and damp was almost overwhelming, and neither Remus nor Harry felt inclined to spend too much time here.

Without warning, Snape let go of Lupin, stumbled forward into the hall and grabbed onto the stair railing. It was taking all of his strength to hold himself up.

"Severus, will you manage from here?" asked Remus with concern.

"Yes, go…" Snape hissed, coughing heavily.

Remus and Harry turned to leave, but before Harry closed the door behind him, he looked at Snape.

"This is not over." He said with more venom in his voice than any seventeen-year -old boy should ever have.

As they walked away, Harry could have sworn that he heard faint sobs coming from behind the creaky old door, but he did not care. Harry had no time for tears of self-pity.


	2. Chapter 2

2. Who Is The Fool?

Severus Snape let go of the railing to which he clutched and allowed himself to crumple to the floor. He was in more pain than he ever thought possible. Along with the Cruciatus Curse, the Death Eaters had thrown a few stinging, burning and cutting hexes in there too. Of course, they would have killed him eventually if it were not for Remus Lupin.

How ironic. After seven years of standing, being apathetic towards the pain and suffering that Snape had received at school, Lupin eventually decided to step in. Of course, the perpetrators were not his best friends this time. Many troubled thoughts like these danced around in Snape's mind until eventually there were so many that he could not pick one from the other.

Hey lay there in a sobbing, bloody heap on the rotting old floorboards for what must have been hours. Several short, smart raps on the door finally interrupted his delirium.

Snape lifted his head and made an effort to ask who was there, but found that he was unable to speak with enough volume for anyone to hear. The only company that he was likely to expect would be that of one of the Dark Lord's Death Eaters to finish off what they had started, but he seriously doubted that they would be polite enough to knock.

He no longer had the strength to hold his head up and succumbed once again to the pain that swept his body. He could hear his visitor tapping the door with what he could only assume was a wand, the door being pushed ajar and light footsteps stepping inside.

Ordinarily, if anyone had entered Snape's property without permission, they may have seriously regretted being born. Right now, however he was beyond caring.

"Professor Snape?" quietly called a young, nervous voice.

Snape recognized it immediately. Hermione Granger.

"Professor?" Hermione edged forward and slowly placed her hand on Snape's shoulder, as though approaching a dangerous, unpredictable animal. Upon her touch, Snape slowly moved his head to look at her. She smiled at him gently.

"Miss Granger, why on earth are you here?" he whispered, almost inaudibly. He had attempted to sound as professional and as strong as possible, like the Professor Snape that Hermione remembered, not the broken wreck that she saw before her.

"Professor Lupin told me what had happened and that you were in a pretty bad way, I couldn't believe that they had just left you here, I had to do something."

"Interfering busy-body as usual then, you have not changed much Miss Granger. Besides, it is not safe for a young witch out on her own tonight, I thought that you at least may have had the common sense to realise this." Every word spoken by Snape caused him great pain, but he was determined to show as little weakness as possible. In fact, he actually found that he was enjoying insulting his pupils as he once had.

"I can take care of myself Professor. You however seem to be in a very different situation. Come on and we will get you sorted out." She went to reach for his arm in order to help him up, but he wouldn't let her.

"Get off of me, I don't need help from a…" Snape began, but stopped himself before he realised what he was about to say.

"From a what Proffesor? From a student? From a mudblood? Well, _sir_, I beg to differ but it seems to me that you need help from whoever the hell is willing to offer, and I can tell you that they are not queuing up outside of the door." Hermione stood, furious; her hands on her hips, gesturing towards the door.

Snape knew that it was true; he knew that he needed help, but never in his life had he ever asked anyone, besides Dumbledore, for help. He found the offer patronising, just as he did when Lily Evans had attempted to help him by stopping James Potter from publicly humiliating him. It wasn't that he particularly disliked 'mudbloods'; he simply knew how to attack someone's sorest spot. That outburst had cost him a dear friend, and this one could cost him his life.

He looked up at Hermione, defeated, and offered her his hand. She took it and placed her other arm around his back, in order to hold him up. She hadn't realised that he would need quite so much support, and although he was not a particularly heavy man, Hermione struggled slightly. She led him up the hall into what she assumed was the kitchen and helped lower him down onto an old, wooden chair that sat in front of a glossed, yellowing table. The small, pokey kitchen was dirty and unused. She switched the light on. The light made Snape look worse than she had expected. He had definitely lost weight since he last taught at Hogwarts. His hair was greasier and more straggly than usual and was matted with blood. His face was a mass of cuts, swells and bruises. There was a particularly nasty one underneath his right eye that was causing his eye to swell to the point where he could barely open it.

Snape leaned heavily on the table in front of him and took deep breaths as though every second was a struggle. Hermione turned the kitchen tap on, half expecting it not to work, to her surprise, clear, cold water came pumping out. She let it run as she searched the cupboards. She eventually produced a small, metal bowl and some mangy cotton. She filled the bowl with cold water, tapped it with her wand and said "_Thermotis"_. The bowl of water began to steam. She the took the cotton, tapped it with her wand and said aloud, "_Polyproctus_ _Sanitactus!"_ The cotton then suddenly quadrupled in size and became bright white.

"OK, I'll clean you up a little, and then you can go and take a bath whilst I brew a healing potion for you." Hermione informed

Snape took a deep breath and prepared himself to speak.

"You brew a healing potion? I know that you believe yourself to be a cut above your fellow pupils Miss Granger, but I doubt that even you could manage such complex magic, despite your excess arrogance." That felt good.

Hermione sighed.

"I don't think that you quite understand Professor, that this will not work if you continue to try and stop me from helping you."

"Don't tell me what I can and cannot understand…"

"Do you want to die here? Do you? Because that it what will happen if you carry on like this. You will die here a lonely, forgotten man who killed the only person who trusted him, and betrayed his master. You will die here, and no one will even realise, or care, that you are dead. Your body will have been half consumed by the rats before anyone even finds you." Hermione had to stop as she found herself choked with tears that she struggled to hide.

"Why do you care?"

"Pardon me?"

"Why do you care if I live or die? Or what people think of me?"

Hermione was looking at the floor in an attempt to hide her face from Snape. She looked up at him, into his sunken, dark eyes.

"Because I believe that somewhere in there, there is a good man. I think that somewhere in your life, something went wrong, and that this is not how it was supposed to be."

He looked at her with curiosity, as though he was realising something for the first time. Hermione sat down on the chair next to him and squeezed his hand, half expecting him to pull away, but he didn't.

"You still have a chance Professor, to show everyone what you can be. I don't believe that you saved Harry tonight simply because you wanted our protection, and I never have believed that you betrayed Professor Dumbledore."

"Then, Miss Granger, you are a bigger fool than I thought you were." Snape pulled his hand away from hers and buried his face in his hands, fighting the tears and memories that began to consume him.


	3. Chapter 3

3.Intentions

Hermione felt numb. She sat and watched Snape disappear into his own darkness before her, but felt nothing. Had Snape really betrayed Dumbledore? Had he really committed cold-blooded murder against the only living soul who believed in him? Harry had been right; Snape's heroism was for his own sake and no one else's. Hermione cursed herself for being so bloody stupid, for trusting that there was some good in her teacher.

Hermione stood up to leave and began to head for the door.

Snape was oblivious to her actions. He did not take notice of or care what was happening around him. Lord Voldemort himself could have entered his company at this moment and he would not have flinched. What had become of his life? He swore to himself that when he left Hogwarts, he would leave 'Snivelous' behind, the cowardly, socially awkward, lonesome, incapable slither of a boy who was nothing but a source of entertainment to his fellow pupils. The friends that he had made in his final years at Hogwarts were going to take him places; they were from rich, pureblood families and closely following the rise of a certain Tom Riddle, a direct descendent of Salazar Slytherin. He would soon be part of the most powerful sect of wizards in the world, and he would show everyone exactly what Severus Snape was capable of. Snape shuddered at the memory, how young and ignorant he had been.

Now here he was, thirty-something years later and as he could see it, very little had changed. He was still so very lonesome, and so socially awkward that he could not even ask this caring young girl before him for the help that he so desperately needed. The only thing that Snape could hope for now was death, yet he was too cowardly to end his own existence. This is where his teenage aspirations of power had brought him, to the darkest place that he had ever been. Oh how he wished that Dumbledore were still here.

As Hermione reached for the door, she turned around to look at Snape and remembered the conversation that she had with Professor Lupin before she had left.

"Professor Snape is in a pretty bad way, but I think that if I had kept he and Harry together any longer, well you understand my point." Lupin pointed out.

"Yes Professor, but are you sure that he will make it through the night? More than anything we must be able to ask him what happened, what information he may have for us. Its vitally important that he remain healthy at least until he has told us all that he can." Hermione said, her inquisitive mind as sharp as usual.

Lupin sighed.

"I believe that once again you are correct Hermione. However, I regret to say that my place is here, with Harry and the order. There is too much going on for me to be spending time helping a man who, some would say, neither deserves nor wants to be helped."

"What about taking him to hospital?"

"For one, I very much doubt that he would agree to go. Also, Mrs Weasley was at St Mungos this morning and said that she has never seen it so busy; people have been queuing for hours apparently, thanks to you-know-who's recent attacks. Somehow I don't see them pulling out any stops for an injured Death Eater, not to mention that as soon as he was healed it would be straight to Azkaban, and no good to us. I'm sorry Hermione, there is just no other option…"

"I'll go."

"Hermione, be reasonable…"

"Why not? I'm pretty sure that my healing potion that I have been working on can help counteract the effects of the Cruciatus Curse."

"Hermione, I have no doubt in your capabilities, but Severus is a different situation all together. Yes he saved Harry, but we are still very unsure of his intentions. He could be dangerous."

"From the way that you describe his condition professor, I doubt that he would pose much of a threat. As you said he saved Harry, and was attacked by the Death Eaters, he could have been killed."

"And we do vitally need whatever information he may have. Yes Hermione, I regret to admit that you are once again correct; there is no other way. Despite his shortcomings, Severus does deserve some compassion for his sacrifice and I can see no other here more capable than you of administering it. However, please do be careful, I beg of you."

"As I said, I doubt that Professor Snape is in any position to…"

"No Hermione I'm not talking about Severus, I do not need to tell you that we are living in dangerous times. Do what you can, but no more."

As Hermione recalled this conversation, she became slightly disgusted with herself. She had not come here to satisfy her own curiosity concerning Snape's loyalty. She had come here to make sure that he was well enough to provide information for the order, and also to show him some compassion for his actions earlier in the night. If she were to return now and say that she didn't help Professor Snape because he had betrayed Dumbledore, everyone would think that she had gone mad! She had always been the only one to question the motives behind Dumbledore's murder, and she daren't speak her thoughts to anyone. Perhaps she should have in order to have had this ridiculous idea removed from her head earlier and therefore avoided the disappointment that she was feeling now. Hermione Granger: the brightest witch of her age, the thought almost made her laugh.

Hermione marched back up the hall and into the kitchen, it would seem that Snape had not noticed her coming or going. He seemed to be in some sort of trance. She pulled a piece of cotton from the ball that she had made earlier and dipped it into the bowl of water.

"Let me see your face." She demanded.

Snape either did not hear her or chose to ignore her.

"Professor Snape!"

"What?" he croaked quietly. He now seemed truly shattered.

"Let me see your face, I need to clean you up."

Snape seemed slightly confused, as though he had just awoken from a deep sleep. He still held his head in his hand and seemed to have little understanding as to what the girl wanted him to do. Hermione realised this, gently moved his hands from his face, held his mucky hair back and gently began to wipe the blood and grime from his hollow face. She took her time and was very careful not to hurt him, not that he would have noticed if she did. The pain coming from the cuts and burns on his skin was incomparable to the pain that was searing through his body from the Cruciatus Curse. This feeling of being looked after was very alien to Snape, and he was quite unsure how he felt about it. His mother had never really cared for him like this as a child, not that he could remember anyway. Snape had always looked after himself, and that was how he liked it.

After a while, Hermione finally finished up.

"I think that you should go and take a bath now, I will begin brewing the healing potion. Where may I do that?"

"Not that I wish to upset you again Miss Granger," Snape said with a slight sneer, "but are you sure that you know what you are doing with this healing potion of yours?"

"Yes Professor", Hermione began rather excitedly. She had wanted to discuss her new potion with someone who knew, and who was interested in what she was talking about. Momentarily forgetting the situation she began to elaborate, "Actually I got the idea from Penn's book of 'Pick me up Potions', but I thought that his ideas were rather basic so I…"

"Please spare me the details Granger, and in return I will tell you where you may brew your potion."

Hermione felt rather foolish, "Yes, sir?"

"Go through to the lounge, and there is a door hidden in the wood paneling, upon close inspection you should be able to see it. Open it and it will lead you downstairs to the cellar where all of my equipment is kept. I own most ingredients, and those which I don't I would not wish to ingest anyway. I assume that I do not need to tell you to be careful, and I trust that you will not be snooping around."

Snape pulled himself up from his chair, slowly and painfully. Hermione offered a helping hand, but Snape ignored it. He slowly made his way through the hall, and as he reached the bottom of the stairs, he sighed at the effort it was going to require ascending them.

"Do you require any help, sir?"

Snape simply looked at her blankly, closed his eyes and disappeared. Hermione gasped, ran to the bottom of the stairs and watched him appear at the top. He stood still for a second, as though regaining whatever miniscule of strength still existing within him, and walked out of Hermione's sight.


	4. Chapter 4

4. Secrets

Hermione entered lounge, scanning the room for the wooden panelling that Snape had spoken of. She found that it covered one wall of the dingy little lounge. She moved towards it, looking for anything that may resemble a door. She let her fingers move over the area, and then she saw, between to overlapping panels of wood, what looked like a hinge. She stood back, pointed her wand at the area and sent sparks flying towards the 'door'. The hinges creaked and the door fell open for her. Behind it lay a set of steep, twisting, stone steps. Hermione cautiously stepped down them and found herself entering a large, dark cellar with walls of stone. The room would not have looked out of place at Hogwarts, which surprised her considering the style, décor and age of the rest of Snape's home. She concluded that it must have been some kind of magic that created this place, probably invisible to the Muggle eye, like Hogwarts.

As daunting and scary as the room was, it was magnificent at the same time. There were cauldrons of every size and shape propped up on various stands, shelves and shelves of various ingredients, everything from nutmeg to 'finger of giant'. One wall was covered entirely with packed bookshelves. At the far end of the room there stood a large oak desk with various pieces of parchment scattered everywhere, with an abandoned quill discarded on top. In the corner stood what looked like a large, stone bowl. Hermione had a quick glance inside and assumed that it must be a pensieve; she had never actually seen one before. She had only heard Harry speak about Dumbledore's.

Hermione reached into her robe pocket and pulled out her recipe for her healing potion. She located a size one cauldron and began scanning the shelves for the specific ingredients. Thankfully they had been arranged in alphabetical order so searching didn't take too long. Once she had collected her ingredients she began brewing her potion, being extremely careful with her timings and sizes.

She had finally added all of the ingredients and all she had to do now was wait for it to brew properly. Whilst she waited she had a little wander, looking at Snape's book collection. She strolled around, had a quick glance at the parchment on the desk and was rather sad to discover that the last thing that Snape had been writing was a lesson plan for his Defence Against the Dark Arts class. She then moved on to have a little look at the pensieve. She would never dream of entering one without the owner's permission, but a little look wouldn't hurt. She looked down and saw several little silver wisps floating around in a sea of blue liquid. Snape's darkest and deepest memories, Hermione hated to imagine what the pensive contained. She moved away from the pensieve towards her potion to see how it was doing, when she was startled by a loud squeak. A large rat ran at her feet from beneath a pile of old robes. Hermione tried to quickly move away from the rat, but stumbled and fell backwards, the small of her back crashing against the pensieve. Before she had realised what was happening, Hermione seemed to be falling from the sky. She landed on her feet, remarkably unscathed, in what seemed to be the Forbidden Forest at Hogwarts.

It was night-time and she could hear voices, apparently coming from behind her. She turned around to find Snape and Dumbledore standing less than two feet in front of her. Startled by their close proximity, she took a step back, and could do nothing but listen to and watch their conversation.

"Severus, do you understand what I am asking of you?" asked Dumbledore with a very solemn look upon his face.

"Yes but I cannot say that I will carry out what you suggest. I simply can't. I have undertaken many assignments for you over the years but I am afraid that this is too much." Replied Snape, trying to uphold his dignity although Hermione could see that he seemed upset.

There was a deep rustle in a not so far away bush followed by a loud, heavy cough.

"Who is there?" demanded Snape, with his wand poised at the ready.

"I believe that it is our game keeper doing what he does best." Dumbledore chuckled.

Snape glanced around suspiciously whilst heavy footsteps could be heard disappearing into the night.

"Severus I am afraid that you have no choice, you have taken an Unbreakable Vow"

"I know magics Albus, deep, dark magics that can go beyond that…"

"Yes Severus I am sure that you do but that is a place which I do not want you venture, for I fear you may never return."

"There must be another way Albus, surely."

"I am afraid there is not Severus. We predicted the possibility of this outcome several years ago, and we planned for it. It is now time to follow through with that plan."

"You do not seem to fear death Albus, why is this?"

"I am old now Severus, very old. My only reason for living would be to ensure that Voldemort does not have his day. It would now seem, ironically, that it would be my death that would help provide this insurance. I'll let you in on a little secret Severus… I look forward to the peace. Before the time comes I will have Harry Potter prepared for the times ahead. He has youth on his side."

"As well as ignorance." Snape scoffed.

"But most importantly Severus, you must not let Draco carry out the task that Voldemort has set him. His soul still has a chance of being saved."

"Yes, of course."

"And when I am gone, the order must not know of your true alliance until the time is fit to tell them, or they have discovered it for themselves. As honourable as their intentions are, this is a secret that must be very closely guarded. Discovery of our plan would likely jeopardise the efforts of the order, as well as put your own life at risk."

"I understand. When the time comes that Draco Malfoy should kill you, I must step in and carry out the task for him." Snape closed his eyes as he said this, as though the thought caused him pain, "and then I must appear to be and have had been faithful to the Dark Lord in order to destroy his efforts from inside his own closed circle, as well as do what I can to protect those in the order."

"Particularly Harry Potter."

Snape sighed, "Yes, particularly Harry Potter."

Hermione looked on, stunned at what she had just heard, yet slightly relieved that her instincts had not been completely wrong. Suddenly she felt a sharp finger tap her on the shoulder. Filled with dread, she slowly turned round to see a very pissed off looking Snape glare at her.

"I don't know what it is about you and your little friends that makes you think that you can go prancing around in other people's memories but it does not amuse." He said very sternly. He looked a lot better, and was wearing a fresh set of black robes. His face was still slightly swollen and bruised but it did not hide the stony look of deep anger, and he had definitely found his voice again.

"S-s-sorry sir, it was an accident I swear, I would never…" Hermione stammered, nerves pulsing through her body.

"It was an accident you say? So say you _accidentally _fell into a three foot high pensieve, what was it exactly that made you _accidentally _stay there?"

Hermione had no response, but she had a brief moment to think. Who was he to be angry with her for discovering that he was not the evil bastard that he had claimed to be? She had helped him! She had believed in him! She had no reason to be sorry or afraid. Amidst these thoughts she discovered that they were back in the cellar.

"Well, Miss Granger?"

"You are certainly looking a lot better." She piped. Hermione knew exactly why Snape was looking better; he had had a nip of her potion before coming to get her from the pensieve. She only wanted him to admit it, to admit that she had helped him.

"Yes well, I could hardly go leaping into a pensieve in the condition that I was in, so I was forced to take your potion before hand."

"And it worked?"

"If you are looking for a pat on the back Miss Granger, I suggest that you go elsewhere. Anyway I believe that you did not answer my question."

"Because I was curious of course, I have spent the past several months contemplating your motives for killing Dumbledore, suddenly I have the answer literally staring me in the face, and you expect me to ignore it? Anyway, why keep it a secret? You can now prove to everyone that you hadn't turned against Dumbledore and the order!'

"That brain of yours is going to get you into trouble one day Granger, pity that your common sense is lagging seriously behind."

"Excuse me?"

"Come with me."

Snape swept up the stony steps of the cellar and Hermione followed. As they reached the top he gestured for her to take a seat in the lounge. She obeyed and Snape sat opposite her.

"I need you to do something for me." Snape said in a very steady, assured voice.

"Yes?" Hermione replied, quite uncertain of what to expect.

"I need you to take an Unbreakable Vow that what I am about to tell you will go no further."


	5. Chapter 5

5. Choices

"An Unbreakable Vow…that's…it's very extreme." Hermione spluttered very much in shock.

"As is the situation." Stated Snape.

"But why? I mean why can't you just tell everyone, or not tell anyone, why me?" asked Hermione, hoping very much that Snape would change his mind about this, as she had a haunting feeling that she knew what he wanted to tell her, and she did not want that burden - to keep it a secret her whole life, and never tell anyone…

"It's merely an exchange of personal satisfactions."

"I don't understand what you mean."

"What I mean, Miss Granger," Snape began impatiently "is that I have something that you want, that is to satisfy your curiosity as to my role in this war. And you, it would seem, have something I want."

"And, what is that Professor?" Hermione was beginning to become very anxious. This was definitely unchartered territory.

"First let me point out, that I am no martyr. I seek no glory or superficial praise for any risks that I may have taken for the sake of others." Snape sighed, as though he already regretted what he was about to say, "However, despite popular theory, I am human. I would not like to leave this earth with no one knowing the truth, with the only memory of me being the vile traitor that killed the pinnacle of good in our world. My problem, however, was that until today I felt that there was no one left alive that I trusted would understand. Now it may be whatever you put in your potion, but it would seem that you have drawn the short straw, that is if you chose to take it."

Hermione was stunned. She couldn't believe that this was Professor Snape. How could she possibly refuse? This man had basically just told her that she was the only person alive that he trusted, how could she refuse him this only chance at salvation? Put simply, she couldn't.

She could see the tension in Snape's face as she thought about her answer.

"Ok, I'll do it."

"You are sure? Do you understand what this involves?"

"Yes, yes of course I do. Although, don't we need a bonder?"

"Traditionally, yes. But it's essentially just a formality. The spell can be cast without one quite easily. Now my wand seems to have disappeared at some point during this evening's events so we will have to use yours. Shall we?"

Hermione obliged and they both knelt on the floor. Snape took one of Hermione's hands in his as she used the other to poise her wand above.

Snape took a deep breath.

"Hermione Granger, will you keep all that is said to you in this room tonight to yourself for as long as you live?"

"I will."

A fiery ribbon shot from Hermione's wand and circled around their joined hands.

"Will you also keep secret the memory that you witnessed tonight in the pensieve."

"I will."

Expecting the spell to end, Hermione began to draw her hand away, but Snape held it in place. She looked up at him, and if she hadn't known any better, she would have sworn that she saw tears glaze his eyes.

"And will you..." Snape halted, trying to compose himself for what he was about to say, as though he may find it too upsetting, "…will you know me and remember me, not for the cold, distant man that everyone knows and resents, but for the man that you have seen and spoken to tonight."

Hermione was taken aback, a lump formed in her throat that almost choked her words.

"Of course I will." She said with a warm smile.

As the spell ended, the fiery ribbon that danced around their hands picked up speed and began to enclose, touching their skin before it disappeared.

There was a long moment of uncomfortable silence when the spell had ended; neither knew what to say. Snape disliked this feeling, and decided to shake it from himself.

"Yes well, I suppose we ought to continue with the proceedings." He piped.

"Yes, yes we should." Hermione agreed, glad to be rid of the awkwardness.

"Well I should start from the beginning, the beginning being my departure from Hogwarts."

Snape could see that Hermione was prepared to listen intently, he began to feel a sense of comfort that she had agreed to be his confidant…his friend really… now that he thought about it. The idea seemed so strange to him, he had never really had a true friend before, unless you counted Dumbledore. Well, he could have had a life long friend had his acid tongue not prevented him. He often wondered if things would have been different had he remained loyal to Lily Evans…but the past was not a particularly nice place to dwell for Severus Snape.

"At this point in my life," he continued, "I was truly miserable. James Potter and Sirius Black had made my life unbearable at Hogwarts, there was nothing that I wanted to do more than show them exactly who I was, what I was capable of. A few of my associates from Slytherin had spoken of a very powerful wizard who was recruiting followers. Their aim was to clear the wizarding world of…"

"Mudbloods" Hermione finished, a disgusted look washed upon her face.

"Correct, but not just mudbl… muggle-borns. Anyone who wasn't pureblood."

"But you are half blood, how did you ever manage to ally yourself with them?"

"I decided that I would have to keep my parentage secret until I was able to prove myself as loyal and useful. After meeting the Dark Lord, I realised that it would not be long until he discovered the truth. My knowledge of dark magics was already very extensive but I worked harder at the dark arts during those first few months, harder than I had ever worked for anything in my life. And may I say, Miss Granger, I would have been fierce competition for you had we attended school together.

By the time that word had gotten around that my father was indeed a Muggle, I was more than prepared. The Dark Lord threw a hex at me and I dispelled just about as soon as he had thought of it. A few of the other Death Eaters also thought that they would give the half blood what he deserved, but my studying had paid off. The Dark Lord soon realised that he and the others had much to learn from me, and so I taught them. Essentially what happened to me tonight was my own doing, I taught them almost every hex that they threw at me tonight, as well as how to hold the Cruciatus Curse for very long periods of time.

Time passed and Voldemort and his followers reigned. I was his most trusted Death Eater. I enjoyed the power and the respect; it was all I had ever wanted. But it came at a price. Every time a wizard died because of what we were doing, a part of my soul would die too. I tried to ignore it, but one particular day I decided that I could take no more."

"Is this to do with Harry, and his parents?" Hermione enquired.

"Ah yes, the Potters. That family has caused me more hurt and grief than you would care to imagine. As usual I was out spying, keeping my ear to the ground, the night that I heard…"

"...The prophecy." Hermione interjected.

"Who is telling this story exactly Miss Granger? Because if you have a more detailed knowledge of my life than I, then I would love to hear it." Snape scorned

"Sorry." Piped Hermione rather sheepishly.

"Yes the prophecy, which by your interruption I assume that you know the details of. Of course I returned to inform my master. I had not particularly thought about what it had meant. However, when he had worked it out I was nothing short of horrified."

"Excuse me, Professor Snape." Hermione said, rather gingerly.

"Yes?" Snape rolled his eyes.

"Well you see, what I don't understand is that you had taken part in the killings of many families before the Potters, I mean you didn't even particularly like James."

"I owed James my life. You are correct, I did not particularly like him but he did prevent me from meeting my fate that particular night in Hogwarts. And as for his wife, Lily, I would not see her hurt for anything in the world."

Hermione gave Snape a surprised look, followed by a nod of understanding. Snape was pleased that he did not have to explain that particular situation to her.

"Also, I knew that they had just had a baby boy. This was one killing that my conscience could not ignore. I went straight to Dumbledore and confessed everything. I didn't care if he had sent me to Azkaban, in fact when I heard that my warning was not early enough, it was what I wished for.

But Dumbledore being Dumbledore, the old fool decided to give me a chance. Although he did use it to his advantage for a while, asking me to act as his spy before Voldemort's demise. Thereafter, neither he nor I believed that we would never hear of the Dark Lord again, so keeping this in mind we decided the leave the window of opportunity for me to act as a spy open. I had to tread very carefully."

"So that is why you dislike Harry so much!" Hermione exclaimed.

"Pardon?"

"I always thought it was because of the way that James and Sirius treated you at school, but it was more than that. Because of what James and Sirius did you decided that you had to prove yourself by joining Lord Voldemort. Not only that, but James married Lily, who evidently meant a lot to you. Voldemort's knowing of the prophecy resulted in Lily's death and James's, whom you could no longer pay back for saving your life. Seeing Harry Potter appearing in your life looking exactly like the man who drove you down that path in the first place, that is why you resent him."

"My I must say. You are quick to catch on." Snape chirped sarcastically. He was actually rather ashamed that Hermione had worked out the truth, "So anyway, the time eventually came when we had to act. Dumbledore kept me at Hogwarts for as long as he could but as the Dark Lord's power grew, it no longer became possible. We had arranged previously that if I were to find myself in the position of making an Unbreakable Vow, I would have to follow through with it, as you probably concluded by the memory that you saw."

"Whom did you make it with?"

"Narcissa Malfoy."

"Draco's mother? Of course, so that you would kill Dumbledore if Draco did not succeed."

"I originally thought that I was taking the vow to protect Draco, but she dropped that minor detail in half way through, I could not possibly back out without being discovered. Draco was never going to succeed; I was not to let him, by Narcissa's orders as well as Dumbledore's.

As a result, I had to do something that no one hoping for any goodness in his or her life ever should, I killed the one person who truly trusted and knew me. I killed the most loved and respected wizard of our time."

"You had no choice, there is no reason as to why the order cannot know, is there?"

"This brings me to my final point. You are correct; during the months leading up to Dumbledore's death I had no choice but to follow the plan that we had made. However when I joined Lord Voldemort I did have a choice. When I taught he and Death Eaters all of the spells, curses and hexes that they have used to terrorize the wizarding world ever since, I had a choice. And when I told the Dark Lord of the prophecy that sent him after James, Lily and Harry, I had a choice. You may have noticed that these particular choices played a major part in the darkness of our time.

I have not led a noble life. I have clung to those with power for the sake of my own reputation, ignoring the consequences. I do not deserve praise, glory or even sympathy so I shall make sure that I do not receive it. I have avoided my fate for too long now, thanks to Dumbledore. Tomorrow I will tell the order all that I can about the Dark Lord and his plans, and then I will probably be sent to Azkaban."

This visibly upset Hermione. "But Professor no, no you deserve more than that. You have put yourself at risk to help us. And Harry – he should know!"

"I think that Harry Potter would be a lot more satisfied hating me completely than having to decide upon a degree of hate based on this information. I should know, I felt the same about his father. I am doing him a favor, the only one that he shall ever receive from me, may I add, so he had better appreciate it."

If that was meant to be a joke, Hermione was not amused.

"I decided upon this long ago, I had even discussed it with Dumbledore and he supported my decision. I am only grateful that I have had someone to share this with, that was most unexpected."

"But Professor, how can I go back to the order knowing what I know? I can't, I simply can't…" Hermione began to lose her composure.

"This is why I warned you of the severity of taking the vow. At least know this, had I not told anyone of what happened I would probably have grown even more bitter and resentful, you have given me contentment. I cannot say that for many people. Anyway Miss Granger, perhaps you had better head back before I have Potter at my door. That is something, which I would find most unforgivable."

Hermione looked up at Snape and smiled in amusement. It had been a long night and she was looking forward to escaping this increasingly mad world to her dreams.

"You are right, I should go. I assume that I will be able to apparate from here?"

"Of course"

"Well Professor, I wish you luck. And I also wish that you would reconsider, although I doubt that I will be able to persuade you. You are a good man and I hope that I will see you again some day."

"I hope so too. Thank you Hermione, I hope to see you do great things one day."

Hermione had nothing else to say. She was exhausted, confused and rather overwhelmed. All she could do was smile in acknowledgment and hope that all of this made more sense in the morning. She concentrated on the Burrow and watched Snape disappear into the darkness of his murky, graying lounge.

Moments later she was standing in the lounge of Ron's house, which had become a temporary residence for most of the order. Professor Lupin was asleep in an armchair. Hermione tried her best to step lightly past him in order to get to bed, but his sensitive hearing woke him.

"Hermione, you are back I see."

"Yes Professor." She wanted to keep this encounter as brief as possible. Not only was she lacking sufficient energy to recite the evening's events, well the parts that she was able to, but more than anything she craved sleep and the peace that it would bring.

"Was your potion successful?"

Hermione nodded.

"And Severus, he behaved himself?"

She nodded once again.

"Very well. I expect that you are tired now."

Lupin could see something new in Hermione's eyes, a new darkness. He had seen it many times before, but never in a girl so young.

"Yes. I will see you tomorrow morning Professor." She began to make for the stairs.

"You are of a rare kindness Hermione. Sleep well."

Hermione stopped and turned around to look at Lupin. He simply smiled and nodded. Unsure of how to interpret this, Hermione returned the smile and at long last, went to bed, wishing that she didn't have to face the morning.


	6. Chapter 6

**Ok this is the final, final chapter! Thank you for the reviews and enjoy (I hope!)…**

6. Remember

Morning had come far too soon for Hermione following a dreamless, restless sleep. As she opened her eyes, she hoped for a brief second that the previous nights events had been a dream, but all too soon reality revealed itself.

Hermione lay, staring at the cracking ceiling of Percy Weasley's old room. An innocent man was going to Azkaban today, and she was only one that had any idea. With a fresh mind she thought about what Snape had told her, and in her mind, embracing the dark side, because the good side wouldn't let you in did not justify a lifetime in prison. She couldn't let this happen, she wouldn't. She was Hermione Granger for goodness sake, if she couldn't think of a way around this Unbreakable Vow then what was she doing here? The only thing that she really had to offer the order was her intellect, and Snape in Azkaban would do the order no good at all. The more that she thought about it, the more that she resented Snape for putting her in this position. Not only had he laid this burden on her, but also he was denying the order of his help.

Hermione got out of bed, washed and got ready for the day ahead. She did not fear it as she had been; she was going to fix this.

Descending the narrow, windy steps she found that, to her surprise, the Burrow was not quite as noisy and as busy as it usually was in the morning. In fact, a stale, eerie silence seemed to engulf Hermione. Mrs Weasley carried out her usual morning ministrations of cleaning and cooking but without her usual busty, cheery air. Mr Weasley and Professor Lupin sat in deep, almost silent, discussion about something very grave and serious. Harry seemed very annoyed as he stomped and thrashed from one side of the room to the other as Ron watched on, helpless. Ginny seemed to be attempting to lose herself in the day's Daily Prophet, but Hermione noticed her red eyes and blotchy face, Fred and George sat opposite one another, slowly and silently consuming breakfast.

Ron noticed Hermione's entrance and jumped, almost startled.

"Hermione…uh, morning…" he had no idea what else he could possibly say. Everyone else looked up at her, the same solemn, uncomfortable look washed across each face. Everyone besides Harry, who quickly glanced at her, running his hand through his hair before softly, punching a wall. Had the wall belonged to him, and not the Weasley's, the punch undoubtedly would not have been so soft.

"What's happened? What's wrong?" Hermione was beginning to panic; she had not seen everyone in such a mood since Lord Voldemort's return. Lupin and Arthur exchanged glances, Lupin stood up and motioned towards Hermione.

"Come with me Hermione." He gently grabbed her arm and led her into the kitchen.

"Professor Lupin, what on earth is going on? Was there another attack?" A horrid thought surfaced in Hermione's mind at that point, "Oh my god, my parents…are they ok?"

Before Hermione could torture herself with this thought, Lupin stepped in.

"No, no Hermione. It has nothing to do with your parents."

Hermione felt a sensation of relief sweep her body, but it was to be short lived

"It's Professor Snape."

Hermione felt a knot tie in her stomach, a sense of dread prepared her for what she was about to hear. 'God no!' she pleaded silently to herself.

"Last night, not long after you left, Severus was attacked in his home by…"

"Death Eaters" Hermione finished, her voice dry and almost unrecognisable. She did not look at Lupin but seemed to concentrate on a spot on the floor, her eyes glazed.

"Yes, Hermione, they killed him."

A flurry of emotions bombarded Hermione at once, she did not know if she should feel angry, or sad…or guilty.

"His wand, his wand!' she cried.

"Hermione, I don't understand…"

"He had no wand, he had lost it at the battle. They filthy bastards attacked a wizard with no wand! If I had stayed, just a little longer…"

"I probably wouldn't have the privilege of speaking to you right now. We are all just so grateful that you returned when you did. You are an excellent witch Hermione, you know that, but no match for three death eaters."

"_Three?_ It took _three_ of them to kill an unarmed, injured wizard. Fucking cowards. Who?"

Lupin seemed confused.

"Who was it? Which three?"

"I don't think that it really matters…"

"WHO THE HELL WAS IT?" Screamed Hermione, the sound of her own voice scared her. Her scream caused some commotion in the lounge, as there was a flurry towards the kitchen. Lupin seemed alarmed, and as people began to surround them, he was unsure how to proceed.

Hermione was oblivious to her new audience. Tears steamed down her face, "Please Professor" she begged in desperation.

Lupin had no choice.

"Bellatrix, Wormtail and Lucius."

Harry was nothing short of amazed at Hermione's reaction. He had no idea that she had been so fond of Snape, he knew that she had spent some time patching him up last night he didn't think that it warranted this much upset on her part.

"Hermione, why are you getting yourself so upset? I know that his attempt at redemption last night bought him some sympathy, but remember that he killed Dumbledore. I thought that you of all people would be able to be rational about this." Said Harry.

Hermione had barely registered what Harry had said to her, but suddenly his presence seemed to mean something.

"Harry!" She yelled as though noticing him for the first time. "Harry, you have to go to Snape's house, it sounds ridiculous but you have to. Go into the cellar and there you will find a pensieve, you have to…"

"Hermione," Lupin interrupted, "the three who killed Severus: they also destroyed his home. There is nothing left to speak of, only a shell. Any pensieve in that building will be long gone."

Hermione felt a darkness fall upon her. There was nothing else that she could do or suggest. No one would ever know who Severus Snape really was.

The following week, leading up to the funeral seemed to contain no individual days. Hermione had spent her time attempting to formulate a plan so that the order may discover Snape's secret, but nothing. She spent hours replaying his final words to her in her mind, wishing that she had paid more attention to what he had said, his body language, his expression…anything…but it was hopeless and she knew it.

The others had become increasingly worried about her, Ron and Harry in particular. They had asked her questions that she was unable to answer, physically unable. They had tried to comfort her and had become frustrated and angry with her on several occasions, but nothing made a difference. The injustice of the situation made Hermione feel suffocated and helpless.

And so it was, Hermione found herself stood looking into a hole in the ground with a dark, cheap wooden coffin held above it. A small metallic plate had been screwed onto the lid with 'Severus Snape' engraved upon it. Hermione had placed a single dark blue rose on top, the only flower to be seen. Herself, Professor Lupin, Professor McGonagall and Hagrid surrounded the coffin. That was all. Snape had given his life and his self worth for the sake of all that is good in the wizarding world, and only four attended his funeral.

Professor Lupin stood at the head of the coffin and began to speak with sadness and a hint of regret in his voice.

"Dearest Severus, I am most unsure as to how we should bid you farewell from this world. You led a troubled life, and I acknowledge that much of that trouble was not of your own doing. I truly believe that none of us…" Lupin glanced at Hermione, "…or very few of us knew you well at all. Unfortunate circumstances and a skewed view of this world perhaps led you down the path that you chose and to this premature end, we can only hope now, Severus, that you have found peace at last."

Hermione felt her body tremor as tears fought their way from her tired eyes. She wanted to scream and tell everyone "Severus Snape was a good man! He was not a traitor!" but couldn't. She was the only one who had shed tears; McGonagall bowed her head, dignified and composed as always. Hagrid, who usually needed no excuse for a good cry, did the same. Hermione had always thought that Hagrid had similar suspicions as her regarding Dumbledore's death but they had never discussed it, and now she never could. She assumed that this was why Hagrid had come at all, after all Snape did kill Hagrid's best friend. Lupin seemed to have some sense of the true tragedy of the situation, the tragedy that only Hermione understood.

Lupin extracted his wand and pointed it at the coffin. It began to slowly lower into the grave below it.

"Goodbye Severus." Lupin said softly as the coffin descended.

"Goodbye Professor." Whispered Hermione, almost inaudibly.

The coffin touched the bottom of the grave and then began to disappear under earth that had begun pouring itself on top. Soon the grave had been filled, and shoots of grass appeared where it once had been. The ground looked untouched and anonymous. It had been decided that Snape would not have a gravestone, as there was no information to write upon it. They had no details of his birth, any living family and no suitable inscription. Only a young oak tree marked his final resting place.

Hagrid, McGonagall and Lupin walked away, leaving Hermione. When she was sure that everyone was gone, she began so sob.

"Why? Why did you do this to me?" she demanded, "Its not fair, you could have been someone! Don't you understand…you could have…" she could no longer speak. Sobbing so hard that she could no longer support herself, Hermione let herself fall to the bottom of the tree. Her tears began to subside and her thoughts dominated, she idly began to pick the bark from the tree.

"At least you didn't have to go to Azkaban, got out of it again eh?" she smiled.

Hermione began to feel the sense of unease and frustration that had haunted her all week drain from her. Snape had had his wish, as long as someone knew him, knew the truth, then he would always be here in some form. Hermione did not believe in coincidences. Snape could easily have died earlier that particular evening; in fact it was nothing short of a miracle that he had survived the battle, that one of the Death Eaters hadn't thrown the killing curse at him. Perhaps he was meant to die that night no matter what, but someone somewhere decided to give him a chance at honesty and honour beforehand.

Hermione lay her hand on the ground, and to her surprise felt something there. It was an oak wand. It looked rather beaten and worn. Hermione picked it up, confused. Suddenly a chill ran up her spine as she remembered something that she had read earlier that week. In her attempt to uncover Snape's secret she had tried to find his wand in the hope that his last few spells would help uncover some truths. Unsure of where to begin looking, she began researching what happens to the wands of wizards who have died. She had discovered that the wand should eventually find its way to the wizard's truest friend. Upon this discovery she had no idea where the wand would end up, as Snape didn't have any true friends that she knew of, and so the idea was forgotten.

She now held in her hand, Snape's wand and in an instant she knew what to do. Pointing it at the tree, what looked like fiery lines appeared on the bark and just as soon, vanished. She then tapped the area with the wand, and in perfect script the following words appeared for a brief second only:

_Professor Severus Snape_

_A silent hero _

_&_

_A true friend._

_I'll always remember._

_H x_

Hermione had done what she could, and no more.


End file.
